I am on my second iPhone and I love it. While AT&T’s service is rather hit-or-miss, the phone itself is the best cell phone I’ve ever owned. Hell, it’s probably the best phone I’ve ever owned, period. Although, to be fair about AT&T, they are getting better; being only terrible in my house and just shoddy in the town I live in. Fortunately, I rarely use the phone when I’m not working, so when I leave town, the service is finally pretty good. But should the iPhone lose AT&T exclusivity, I’d probably make a jump.
About two years ago, when Apple introduced the original iPhone 3G and iPhone OS 2.0, they included something new: apps. For those of you who don’t know what an “app” is, (HELLO PEOPLE OF PLANET NEPTUNE!!) an “app” is short for “application” and it is basically a small program which you can use to take advantage of the phone’s other computing capabilities. When Apple introduced apps, they also introduced a gateway to them through their iTunes software called the App Store. Over the past two years, Apple and their app store have been wildly successful, selling approximately two billion apps and hosting over one hundred twenty five thousand different apps. Many are free, but many more are for sale. Whenever Apple introduces a new product or updates to their existing hardware lineup, they boast about the success and number of applications on the app store, and how it is a virtual goldmine for some of the programmers who have built apps. And Apple isn’t kidding, either. Open up your iTunes software and go to the app store. Get past the main page and take a look at how many apps you have to choose from. Rather impressive, isn’t it? People wouldn’t keep writing them if they weren’t making money off of it.
Here’s the thing: most of them are crap. I don’t mean crappy, I mean crap. They’re shit. Poopie. Ka-Ka. Useless. Idiotic. In plain English, “A-WASTE-OF-MONEY.”
Now I admit that I’m actually not in the majority. My iPhone is a business tool, not a personal cell phone. When I’m not working, the phone mostly sits and charges. The only time I really use it when I’m not working is to take work phone calls. Most people buy the iPhone as a personal cell phone (between the phone and the service, it is a very expensive personal cell phone. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t need something like it for business reasons). And the apps tend to lean more towards the personal use side of iPhoning (a new word?) instead of business use.
I have 42 apps on my iPhone right now. Many of them are news readers, one is a business card transcriber. A couple of coupon aggregators (which I do use occasionally for personal use), prescription drug finders which I use in my work, Skype, a price checker, and an ereader. Most every app I have on there is free. I’ve purchased three apps only, with the most expensive app being a $15.99 business card scanner. But everything else was free. I’ve pulled off over a dozen other applications because they were all crap. Either poorly written or totally useless, including an app to write or monitor this very blog. And there’s even more apps than that which I’ve browsed but never grabbed because I either thought it was crap, or I thought it should be free and passed on it. There was a joke last year, when Apple said they had over 80,000 apps, the response to that was usually, “and how many of them make farting noises.” That’s the kind of app that gets sprinkled around the few gems of the store.
But Apple, for all its hype, at least innovates. If they aren’t the first to market with something, they’re the first to market with something usable by the average person. And the app store is no different. Now that Apple has shown other large companies how to create and sell apps, everyone wants to have an app store of their own. I’m going to write a post one day about the lack of innovation and how so many companies want to be a “killer” of some competitor’s product and they are doomed to fail. Anyway, have you noticed how there are app stores popping up all over the place now? Palm has an app store for the Pre. Android cell phones have an app store. For god’s sake, I had to buy a new printer a couple of months ago (don’t get me started on that one) and HP was advertising there’s now an app store for printers! Yes, you read that right: you can now get apps for your printer. Hey HP, I’ve got an app for you: make your printers print stuff. How’s that? Think I can sell it on your app store for $9.99?
I think I saw a refrigerator advertising it is net enabled and now has the ability to download apps. This deserves no comment from me.
Netbooks are also coming out with an app store. A netbook is basically a very small, underpowered laptop which is usually very inexpensive. But it is a freaking computer! And they’re going to add an app store for your computer. They already have an app store: it is called the internet! Go to download.com, Google in what you want and you’ll find it. What the hell is an app store for your computer all about?
And finally, even my beloved Kindle is getting into the loser’s game of Apple-see, Monkey-do. Last week, Amazon announced they’re putting out a software developers kit so people can create their own apps for the Kindle. Why? Yes, Apple came out with a tablet this week that reads books. Big deal, it won’t be as good an experience as it is on the Kindle. Yeah, tech people are saying how great it will be. But just as Amazon has a second rate music download store to compete with Apple’s iTunes, Apple will have a second rate ebook store to compete with Amazon’s Kindle store. The LCD on the new iPad won’t compare with eink. You think you want a color screen for reading books? Why? How many paper books do you read right now that has color in it? I’ve got hundreds in my house and very few have color (although I think the iPad might be the thing we’ve been looking for to read comic books and graphic novels). What the hell are people going to try and get their Kindles to do? I want my Kindle to do one thing: display a book I can read without turning my eyes bloodshot. And do it in such a way that my battery doesn’t need charging by the end of the day. They don’t need an app for their device!
I’ll bet you within a year, people will be laughing at the amount of crap and uselessness in all these app stores, including Apple’s. There’s just too much junk there.
The reason Apple is where it is today is because they innovate. The reason Amazon excels at a few things and is quite mediocre at others is they innovated at what they’re good at. A consumer can smell quality vs. a quick grab for money a mile away. It is time companies stop trying to rip off other people’s ideas and start trying to either come up with their own or improve on existing ideas and make them truly better. When history looks back on this period, I think they’ll be laughing at us for our “app store craze.” And they’ll be right. One company got it right (albeit there’s a lot of junk surrounding the true genius in there), everyone else is just freaking embarrassing.
